25.7.16

Grow Up


See, I'm trying to find my place
But it might not be here where I feel safe
We all learn to make mistakes
Cause I'm just one of those ghosts
Travelin' endlessly
And now I'm told that this is life
That pain is just a simple compromise
So we can get what we want out of it

Now that I'm in my twenties, I realize time is passing faster than ever. Freedom becomes increasingly expensive and scarce. My priorities reshuffle so much in this year alone and I've made some life-altering decisions. I never know if I make the right moves. The term "coming of age" is defined as "the age or occasion when one formally becomes an adult". Growing up, I believed adulthood was marked by age and milestones. Is it really? Is adulthood romanticized? I have been thinking a lot about adulthood lately. Having completed my degree in school and securing a full-time job, I thought I would have figured it out by now. Truth is, I have not. Perhaps none of us ever will. If anything, the transition into so-called adulthood feels like a lonely and uncertain one. 

Anyway, Nigel took me to Kombi Rocks, a retro concept diner located North of Singapore. Its interior is plastered with 1960s memorabilia such as posters of The Beatles and mod girls on Vespas. Car collectors would love the owner's collection of vintage automobiles. I love nostalgic spaces like this! The boyfriend knows exactly how to cheer me up. Thank you. <3

I'm wearing vintage Beth Michael's romper, mom's vintage leather bag, G.H. Bass oxfords and vintage Casio watch.

Photos by Nigel.

27.6.16

Hokkaido: A Countryside Diary


Hokkaido may be a winter time destination but that doesn't mean it has anything less to offer in the summer. Being my first trip to Japan, I chose to head north because I craved a quiet destination with beautiful scenery away from the city's chaos. There are many perks to summertime Hokkaido. The weather was absolutely perfect, ranging from 6—23-degree celsius, making road trips a breeze. That being said, the long journeys and curvy mountain roads took a little getting used to, though a good music playlist would make everything better.


3.6.16

Pages Of Gold


Show me the way it used to be
Show me I want to see
I am no longer afraid of my past
I want to confront all my new tasks

Show me the river where we swam
Show me the miles that we ran
From ourselves
And nothing more

There are some days when I wish I could time travel. There's a saying, "our minds aren't good offices" which is why we take notes – to remember things and other minute details. I'm really glad I caught my second Annie Leibovitz exhibition, titled 'Women: New Portraits', in Singapore. Her photographs, far from 'perfect', always show me some form of vulnerability within her subjects. Held at the old Tanjong Pagar railway station, its aged grittiness made quite a spot for an afternoon of aimless book browsing and daydreaming. 

I'm wearing vintage 70's maxi dress from Granny's Day Out, vintage Calvin Klein bag, c/o Misaki pearl earrings and vintage Casio watch. 

Photography by Yun Jing.

31.5.16

Dear May,

 Dear May,

You have been so good to me. I wrote in a blog post beginning of this year,

You don't just move on from your problems no matter how you want to. That is why I am afraid to make new year resolutions. Do we really stick to those? Having said that, I look back at the past two months and realized I've been subconsciously making changes to better myself, and I'd like to give myself credit for that...It's time I stop undermining myself and begin to truly live in the moment. To own less and to do more. To live, not regret. To love myself and be selfish if I needed to. To accept criticism but not broken. To see the world without losing myself. Easier said than done, but I am only human.

My confidence in new year resolutions is bleak but I believe in taking chances. One open door leads to another. It doesn't matter if I don't know where I'm going as long as I keep on going. What a cringe-worthy statement. Ew. But cliches are real.

Nigel went to Kenya for five weeks for his school's overseas community immersion programme. It's never easy being separated from a loved one by distance and time, even if five weeks seem so insignificant compared to a lifetime. But I am so lucky to be able to communicate with him every night because reading his text messages about his day makes me smile. This May, I was shown to a different side of love, a foreign concept that only a yearning heart could grasp. I am so lucky.

School is officially out. What a surreal moment having to be in the education system for more than 16 years. It's a long time, end of a chapter, but I feel like my life has just begun. Maybe it's pure foolishness of youth to think a working life would kill the soul, yet the 22-going-23-year-old self feels optimistic about my future. My friend Kaixin once told me, "you go to school to learn how to learn". May this attitude endure the rest of my adulthood.


Lastly, I spoke at a conference for the first time in my life. I promised to give myself due credit for the littlest milestones and I will today. I am very proud of myself. The past month has been surreal in every way. Expressing my thoughts on stage was cool, but receiving genuine feedback from people was a gift. We all need feedback, good or bad because that is how we grow. I am filled with so much gratitude.

Wow, what a difference a few months could make. Looking back, life is amazing and it's worth living. I wish I knew that in my teens.

Thank you, May. I want to always remember you.


15.5.16

Room 180



She wore blue velvet
Bluer than velvet was the night
Softer than satin was the light
From the stars


It's quite obvious that Blue Velvet has been my favourite song this month. I couldn't pick one so I thought I'd share three versions with you. 

During my complimentary one-night stay at the luxurious Marina Bay Sands hotel, I convinced Jing to join me on this 'staycation' and of course we had to take full advantage of the room's interior and perfect lighting situation. I had just returned to my room after a fancy cocktail party with my evening dress and decent makeup, thanks to my industrial strength mattifying spray by Urban Decay, and I was not going to let my efforts getting glam go to waste! 

Jing has an eye for invisible details which most people including myself would overlook. This looks like a planned photoshoot but in fact, it's amusing how we finished it in 15 minutes all whilst chatting and rummaging corners of the room for alternative light sources. 

I love everything about this series. Not only for the retro style furniture and wallpaper which are rarities in our modern city, but I felt like I was living in a Mad Men set. That meant a lot to me because Mad Men is my all-time favourite TV series. Oh, and my favourite characters would have to be Joan for her sass, Betty for wardrobe and Roger for his tasteful yet offensive wit. The captions were some quotes I took from the show. They make absolutely no sense but that's okay. 

I'm wearing a Covet by Love, Bonito dress, ZARA nude pumps, vintage Casio watch, Kate Spade bag and YSL lip stain in No. 2. Skincare products in courtesy of my current skin treatment provider The Wellness Clinic.


Photographed by Yun Jing & captioned by me.